i secretly like getting assigned seats in school because it takes away that awkward “i have no friends in this class where the fuck am i gonna sit” factor
I think my parents consider me to be a god. Because they always ask me ridiculous questions that I don’t have the answer to.
do you wanna have sex?
c) a + b
There was just a baby sleeping on me for over an hour meaning I couldn’t move or anything
If God had chosen Bobby to stop the apocalypse, he would have done it in half an episode and spent the other half drinking beer and watching sports.